If you’re here looking for dirty laundry about my time as an Ex-Reconstructionist, I’m sorry to disappoint you.

The fact are simple.  I began my training as a Wiccan.  I became a Reconstructionist for a while after a crisis of faith in my local pagan community.  I was a dedicated (as in “committed”) Reconstructionist for a couple of years.  How committed?  Committed enough to learn Gaidhlig to an intermediate level on my own dime for no other reason than to do research and rip apart etymologies and sentence structure for clues to cultural mindset — in other words, damn committed.  I left Reconstructionism because I couldn’t agree with the severely discriminatory attitudes of the group members towards other pagans.  It just felt wrong to be that condemning of a fellow human.  Not all Reconstruction groups are like this, but this one was.  I returned to Wicca braver and stronger, fired up with a mission to trace down the roots of the Craft and embrace them for whatever I found there, regardless of what anyone else said about their validity.  I also learned a few things about the dynamic between general pagans and Reconstructionists (or Fundamentalists of any pagan branch) that have become part of the foundation of my path.

It took a while to work through the flotsam and jetsam of the wreckage of the various experiences, but when I did, I realized how many treasures I’d gained from the experience.  It’s those treasures I want to share with you now, not the drama, in the hopes that it will help mend some rifts among all branches of paganism.  After all, I’ve defected from Wicca and from Reconstructionism only to come back to Wicca quite happily.  I know what pisses off people on both sides of the fence.

We CAN have better relationships between us if we try.

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FOR WICCANS/PAGANS

• Do not take a tradition from another culture and call it an ‘ancient Wiccan tradition’. It’s wrong, it’s bullshit, it’s disrespectful to the culture from which you borrowed it and proves you know nothing.  Nothing gets a Reconstructionist hotter under the collar than cultural appropriation without proper attribution.  That’s not saying you can’t, for example, do a Bride’s Bed rite for Imbolc.  What I’m saying is, when you teach that or explain it to another, you need to phrase it thus:  “Our ritual tonight will include a tradition from the Scots-Irish culture known as Bride’s Bed.”  This very neatly gives credit to the culture that birthed the tradition.  Not telling people where you got the idea is like plagiarizing the religious creations of an entire race.  How would you like it if someone took something you created and was sacred to you and then passed it off as though it were theirs?  EXACTLY.  So don’t do it.  You’re not just offending a person when you do it… you’re offending an entire CULTURE.

• Do not use a tradition you haven’t researched and do not understand.  Cultural traditions are powerful keystones to the energy of that culture and are not to be used “for your pleasure”. Be respectful of the traditions you are utilizing by giving them your energy via research before putting them into practice.  The Gods are not your personal “call girls” and “gigolos” that you can call up without knowing them, use them for whatever you want to use them for, and then send them home.  Likewise, remember that certain traditions are meant to cause certain effects.  Be sure you know what those effects were and that you want those effects.  A good example is the tradition of jumping a Bel-fire for fertility.  If you are using this tradition, you’d better make sure that everyone knows what it’s for before you send them in a line to jump it.  It’s not a conga line!  People will get pregnant!

• Do not ridicule Reconstructionists by calling them anal, holier-than-thou, or any other derogative term. Not all of them behave that way (though you will run into some) and your accusations speak more to a lack of security in your own faith than the practice of theirs.  If you know your path is right for you, what does it matter if they act like your path is substandard?  If they’re rude to you, it makes them look bad.  If they’re rude to you after you’ve done something dumb (like trying to convince them that Wicca is traditionally Celtic), you will just have to take your lumps.  Get your facts straight.  That leads to…

• Do not argue with a Reconstructionist using evidence of “what feels right”, “what works for you”, or anything else you have not foot-noted and are not able to cite. Reconstructionism requires research into facts and this movement takes their scholarship seriously.  If you do not bring your facts to the table, you have brought a knife to a gun fight.  When you get shot in the ass, try not to drop your blade through your big toe.

• Do not try to convince the Reconstructionist that Wicca is an ancient path. Matter of fact, don’t do this within earshot of a Reconstructionist either.  You will lose and you will deserve it.

• Do not accept negative treatment at the hands of a Reconstructionist or anyone else and don’t make an ass of yourself either. You don’t need to cite sources to demand courtesy and respect.  My experience was with Celtic Reconstructionist / Traditionalists.  What I learned about those cultures were that they were very inclusive, absorbing people from other tribes and lands and thus some of their cultural differences as well.  Hospitality and good manners were high on the list of virtues for people in their societies.  Even if they disagree with you, respect should be fundamental.  Having an Irish Triad or two about good character tucked away in your pocket can be helpful for restoring civility.  Just be sure that you have also behaved civilly or again… all bets are off.

~and because they are also a Fundamental group~

• Be very careful not to claim lineage you don’t have when interacting with British Traditionalist Witches.  Gardnerian lineage goes male-female-male-female and so on.  If your initation lineage doesn’t look like a gender tennis match, it isn’t valid.  End of story.  Don’t make up a lineage to make you look good.  Don’t make up a family tradition and say that it makes you better than a BTW… matter of fact, don’t make anything up.  If you don’t have the balls to just be a Witch because you’re a Witch, if you need to make up some grand tale of witchiness to make you more valid, then stop right now because you don’t have what it takes.  I’m of the opinion that if you couldn’t potentially hold your own as a Solitary, needing no one’s validation but your Gods’ validation, then your power will always be determined by someone else telling you that you’re a Witch.   If you need a lineage to give you power or authenticity, then go get it and make the effort.  Don’t lie about it.  That demeans the efforts of all the people who have gone to the efforts and done it the hard way.  Also, realize that the word Wicca was originally applied to groups coming out of Gerald Gardner’s lineage.  If you don’t have that lineage, many BTW’s don’t believe you deserve to use that word to describe yourself.  The cat is really too far out of the bag to get back in now, but at least be sensitive to the fact that it may be an issue for some and don’t be discourteous to those who are still upset about the way things have gone.  It’s not your responsibility to make amends for hundreds of thousands of other Wiccans in the world, but respect is still the way to go.

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FOR RECONSTRUCTIONISTS

• Do not assume that all Wiccans/pagans are cultural horse-thieves.  We aren’t. I happen to be very careful about NOT padding the history of the Craft or absconding with cultural traditions without proper footnotes.  I don’t need to make what I do “more valid” by lying about it.  And I don’t suffer such bullshit from those I teach, either.  Respect goes both ways.  I happen to be thankful for Reconstructionists and their ability to research and give us access to roots so deep.   I’m not the only one that feels that way.  I’m willing to be respectful to you and argue your case among others like me, but I require that you at least be worthy of the good word I speak of you, your efforts, and your traditions.

• Do not discount our practices because we can’t prove they were done just that way 2,000 years ago.  On the other hand, if that’s what someone claims, that person is opening himself up, isn’t he?  (Notice I said THAT PERSON, meaning ONE… you can take THAT ONE to task, not cut us all down in one fell swoop).  Our religious mode of expression has pagan roots from a number of cultures.  It also contains a lot of inspired ritual and new traditions.  It gets us where we want to go.  A car is a valid form of transporation based on where it gets you, not what it looks like, what fuel it takes, or what CD is playing through the stereo.  Instead of judging us on whether or not we are as “right” as you, ask and accurately assess if our practices “do work” FOR US and if those practices effect the changes for which we aim.  We aren’t going to do the same things you do — so don’t measure us by a 2,000 year old measuring stick.

• Be nice.  Courtesy is fundamental and that’s about as much “fundamental” as we’re willing to put up with. The large majority of pagans came here from a fundamental Christian path that said anything except Christianity was a sentence to hell.  Most of us in the general pagan community (and in the Reconstructionist movement) came from this place of judgment and damnation and shame.  So we’ve all had just about enough of someone telling us that we’re not “right enough”, “good enough”, or “worthy enough”.  Some of us understand that your dedication to the truth/facts of the past is very important to you.  Many of us love the past as well, but feel the Now is more important, that we create the traditions of the future based on meeting today’s challenges with today’s knowledge and wisdom.  Neither is more right or more wrong.  It’s just another example of diversity that could, if we could stop fighting, help us as a whole community to be stronger and more alive.  Manners are the nails that hold bridges of community together.

• Understand that when you start throwing around facts about the Past, many of us think you’ve stopped listening to what we see and feel in the Now. Your love of facts and tradition is beautiful.  So is our active expression and new creation of modern spirituality that we call our faith.  If every conversation turns into a dissertation of what was done 2,000 years ago — and then STAYS THERE — you’re going to lose connectivity with us.   Most people who aren’t knowledge whores (like me) are going to get bored and likely tick you off with a sigh of boredom or exasperation or simply walk off.  The past is important for what it brings forward into the future, but we live in the Now.  By all means, tell us what our ancestors did and what they knew, but realize you are speaking with and interacting with people who don’t live quite so much in love with the past.  Interact with us in the moment, please, if we’re willing to go along with you in your time machine.

• If a Wiccan/Pagan is in error about something, realize your opportunity to do something great! Yes, there’s a lot of ill-informed people out there.  As a student of history, you’re going to spend time doing education — especially considering that it’s pretty impossible for everyone to be an expert on everything at the same time.  But there are two ways of going about it.  You can educate from a position that ridicules and debases a person’s self-esteem.  Or you can educate in a way that helps that person realize that making mistakes is part of learning and that learning can be fun.  When correcting someone about their faith, realize you are dealing with very sensitive stuff.  Moreover, you are dealing with people who have likely come out of a religion where there is a definite “right” and “wrong” and who are just learning again to open their intuitions up.  If you slam them hard with a fundamentalist attitude towards history and modern pagan practice, you will not only be tapping their facts… you’ll be dealing with their fears, their opening psychic abilities, their self-esteems, all of it.  You have the potential to do a lot of damage with your facts and cited sources and your method of delivery.  Or you have the potential to instill in them a beautiful love for culture, a respect for those cultures, and a desire to add research to their path as a spiritual exercise.  If you get an instantaneous defensive response, that’s a sign that the open door you thought you had to educate someone is rapidly closing or is already closed.  No one will take lightly to having the door beat down, no matter how nice the hammer or how sweet the blow.  Know when you have an “open door moment”, and then talk to the person with excitement and let the love of your subject shine through.  You will notice a difference in how you are received.  Be a force for good, not simply an irresistable force determined to pound the immovable object of suspected ignorance to a pulp.
  

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I believe that both modern Wiccans/Pagans and Reconstructionists are healthy parts of the current pagan movement.  It’s wonderful that we have such diversity to allow our people a choice of how they want to express their faith.  We have things to learn from each other, but that is going to require understanding, and understanding requires conversation, and conversation requires respect as the first step.  I believe that the suggestions I’ve made are a few steps we could take to show that respect and thus begin a dialogue that will lead us into the future in a more unified way.

I’ve had bad experiences as part of both a Wiccan and a Reconstructionist path.  That had more to do with the people than the paths.  Have your issues with the people and their actions if you need to, but leave the Paths (as a whole) and their practioners (as a whole) out of it.  I can say that both paths have a lot to give, but the offering bowl/quaiche won’t hold any kind of offering for anyone if we continue to fill them to the brim with ego, bitterness, and spite.

Slainte!  I drink to the health of our pagan community.  I hope you’ll share a cup with me.

Published August 2, 2009 — Witchvox Featured Article (WV Title:  Healing The Gap Between Modern Paganism and Reconstructionism).

Photo by Eddi 07 (via Flickr).